American Dicks: America's Penis Size by City and State

A lot of men obsess over how they compare to other men, but have you ever wondered how your city or state measures up to the rest in terms of average penis size? Finally, intercity and interstate debates over who has the biggest dicks can be put to rest, because the truth is out. Condomania, America's first condom store just opened its database of penis sizes as well as their ranking of all 50 states and the 20 most populated American cities.

Condoms, Commerce, and Curiosity

This penis size study is the largest of its kind. Prior to Condomania's survey, the largest survey had been in 1948 when the Kinsey institute got 2,500 men to pull out and measure. Now, with a sample size almost 10 times that of the 1948 study, we can get a really interesting picture of the penises of America. The survey asks men to measure their penis size (length and girth) down to the millimeter. The participants' penis sizes are then matched to one of 76 categories of length and girth combinations. But this rigorous penile probe isn't purely for the purpose of scientific curiosity. The real reason behind Condomania's survey is to inform their line of tailored-fit condoms, called TheyFit. Which is a pretty good idea if you ask us.

The Results: How Does Your City and State Measure up?

So the results are in, and you can't argue with science. Hopefully this won't upset anyone. As far as states are concerned, the top ranking state by average penis size is New Hampshire. I can't imagine why, but there you have it. Perhaps their motto of "Live Free or Die" should be changed to "Live Large or Get Out." The lowest happens to be Wyoming. Sorry Wyoming. As far as cities go, why not list them from largest to smallest (penises)? Coming in first is New Orleans:


20 Most Populated Cities Ordered by Penis Size

1. New Orleans
2. Washington DC
3. San Diego
4. New York City
5. Phoenix
6. Portland
7. Atlanta
8. San Francisco
9. Chicago
10. St. Louis
11. Seattle
12. Miami
13. Indianapolis
14. Columbus
15. Boston
16. Denver
17. Los Angeles
18. Detroit
19. Philadelphia
20. Dallas/Ft. Worth

50 States Ordered by Penis Size

1. New Hampshire
2. Oregon
3. New York
4. Indiana
5. Arizona
6. Hawaii
7. Louisiana
8. Massachusetts
9. Alabama
10. Washington
11. New Mexico
12. California
13. Arkansas
14. Nevada
15. Virginia
16. Tennessee
17. Illinois
18. Oklahoma
19. South Dakota
20. Georgia
21. Pennsylvania
22. Mississippi
23. Michigan
24. Florida
25. Rhode Island
26. Kansas
27. Maryland
28. Minnesota
29. Vermont
30. Connecticut
31. Wisconsin
32. New Jersey
33. North Dakota
34. Idaho
35. Texas
36. Missouri
37. Montana
38. Ohio
39. Nebraska
40. Colorado
41. Maine
42. North Carolina
43. Delaware
44. South Carolina
45. Kentucky
46. West Virginia
47. Alaska
48. Iowa
49. Utah
50. Wyoming

Don't Pass On a Small Set of Family Jewels

According to the shocking CBC documentary entitled The Disappearing Male the world is witnessing a worrying decline in the number of boys being born. The in-depth doc cites lots of factors that have played a part in this change but one of the most notable is petro-chemicals. Petro-chemicals are everywhere. They are used in making plastics and are found in almost everything from pesticides to processed foods and fabric to shampoo.

While this news may send a shiver down the spine of our female readers, the men might be looking at the bright side, thinking that this could lead to a future filled with more favorable ratios: less boys, more choices. But before you guys get too excited I better tell you about the big, or should I say small, catch: these petro-chemicals that are causing fewer boys could also be causing a boy that does make it out of the womb to have a smaller than average penis. Add to that a 200% increase of genital defects and abnormalities reported in the last two decades and a 50% drop in sperm counts of an average North American college student over the course of one generation, and you have a problem of notable size.


Okay, so you might be wondering how this affects you and your penis size now, and really, it doesn’t. But before you dismiss the warning I propose you to take one moment and ask yourself: Do I want to pass tiny wiener genes down to my son? After all, your genes represent you, where you came from and how you lived; they speak about your strengths and weaknesses – to the very core they are you. They are probably the best way to make a good impression on future babes. And of course there’s the wellbeing of the kids themselves. Why put your baby boy through the torment of having a small penis? The least you can do for your kin is try your hardest, longest and widest to ensure they have strong, healthy bodies.

The Tips for Well-Endowed Genes

So after watching this documentary I devised three easy steps to help you reduce your interaction with these petro-chems, and in turn, keep your genes well-hung. Unfortunately man-made chemicals are pretty hard to avoid, so unless you’re content with re-locating to the moon, following this advise may be the best way to pass on the biggest set of family jewels possible in this chemical age.

Here they are:

1.Eat Organic

That’s right, the hippies knew it, now you do too. Organic food is pretty much chemical free so it’s not only good for you, it’s good for your body, but for your genes – meaning your kids’ bodies.

2.Use Plastic Sparingly


This may be completely impossible, but any reduction in plastic in your home will help. This means buying natural-fiber clothes, storing food glass tupperware and using natural shampoos and soaps. Anywhere you see plastic, think of an alternative.

3.Avoid Chemicals in the Air

Stay decidedly upwind and upstream of any heavily industry plants, or any heavily industrial cities for that matter (sorry, you’ll have to skip that Pittsburg getaway…darn). This one may seem a little extreme, but some would go to great lengths in the pursuit of a long shlong.

And, if none of these things work, you'll have to teach your offspring about penis enlargement techniques.

Dear Morgan: Lost and Little

Dear Morgan,

I'm a longtime PE Inc reader. It's cool that you're doing an advice column, because I have a question that hasn't really been answered by the articles here, and it would have been weird to email it in to the other staff.

Here goes: I'm a heterosexual guy. I date casually. It's small, and I know it. Now what do I do with it?

Dear LAL,

First off: thanks for the letter! I can hold this up and waggle it in my boss' faces if they ever question why a penis enlargement site needs a sexual advice columnist on staff.

Now, let's get straight to your question: you've got a small penis, you acknowledge the fact, and you're wondering what to do with the darn thing.

I commend you on your approach – many men struggle with size issues, but few look to actually overcome them by becoming a better lover. You're doing well so far! Now the biology. You state very clearly that you like to put your less-than-average [whatever that means] penis into a heterosexual vagina.

So let's talk about vaginas! I'll give you the tip of a lifetime: a woman only has nerve endings in the first quarter, and final quarter of her vagina. This means that while you are inside of her, she can't necessarily feel very much in the very middle of the length of her vaginal canal, but she can feel you when you bump her cervix with the head of your penis and she registers friction and heat and pressure and all of those good things right at the entrance.

So if you're never going to be bumping that cervix, don't even worry about it. Plenty of girls hate the sensation [I am not one of them, but we can talk about alternatives to your actual dick in a moment].

Cervix forgotten, you're back where you started – the door you came in by. All the nerve endings are here. The G-spot isn't too far from here. Neither is the clit. You've got one prime zone, and you should be working it for all it's worth!

Now this isn't about going willy-nilly, but rather about asking your partner what she likes. Try simply rocking the head of your penis in and out, only entering about an inch or so each time. This gives you a great view, and leaves your hands free to caress that clit.

If you're worried about girth, then get the toys out of the box and go to town. Nothing makes me happier than a man who isn't necessarily the biggest in the bulge department, but who is completely game for hot sex with all the jelly dongs and vibrating bullets and tickling cock rings and....
www.goodforher.com

Getting carried away, but you get the idea. There are some neat toys that actually work like stretchy cock rings, but will vibrate against both your balls and her clit when you fuck her. If you're not going in deeply, then you need to have all your guns firing at once. She'll appreciate it, I guarantee.

There are some great toys that work well for both partners, including this one:

The We-Vibe is a knockout. I can't say enough good things about this baby, just believe that if you're looking for something that adds the feeling of girth and size without taking away from the enjoyment of straight-up sex, this is the ticket. we-vibe.com

The We-Vibe was invented by a fellow from Canada, where the winters are long and dark, this little darling works alongside you. She inserts it and then you slide in with it and plenty of lube for a buzzing thrumming revelation. Believe.

A side note: if you're having casual sex with a number of partners, be a gentleman and don't share sex toys. I don't care if you're washing them – unless they can go in an autoclave [i.e. are made of glass or steel or heat-resistant plastic], they shouldn't be hopping from crotch to crotch.

Average Penis Size in the Animal Kingdom

Many people wonder about the average penis size in humans, and how they measure up in comparison with the average man. If you've been asking this question, the answer to your query is that the average size for human males is about 5.5 inches when erect. Now that you know how you measure up in comparison to the human population, don't you wonder where you stand in comparison to the rest of the animal kingdom? Well, we've compiled some interesting facts about penis size in the animal kingdom. Some of it might surprise you. Who knew that a humble duck could be so well-endowed?

The Biggest Penis of Them All

The biggest penis in the animal kingdom appropriately enough belongs to the biggest mammal in the animal kingdom. Yes, the mighty blue whale holds the title for biggest penis, with reported measurements of up to 2.4 meters, or a whopping 8 feet! They also have extremely dexterous penises, as they are able to move and bend them in the water almost like limbs. It might be kind of cool to have that kind of dexterity...

Penis Size if Relative

Obviously the biggest animal in the world has the biggest penis, but compared to its enormous body size, the blue whale's penis isn't that big. The smallest penis in the world happens to belong to the tiny rodent, the common shrew, whose average penis size is a mere fifth of an inch long. This doesn't change the fact that compared to overall body size, rodents are pretty well-endowed. Conversely, gorillas, who are the largest of the primates, also happen to have the smallest relative penis size. Humans on the other hand, although being much weaker than the gorilla, have the largest relative penis size out of all the primates. African bull elephants have one of the largest penises in the animal kingdom with respect to overall body size. Their penises can reach a massive 6 and a half feet long. Yowza. The animal holding the title for biggest penis relative to body size is the humble barnacle, whose penis can be up to 50 times its body length! The reason for this is that barnacles lack mobility and need to do some serious reaching to mate with other barnacles. It really gives new meaning to the term “long distance relationship.”

Penis Shapes & Sizes

Not only is there a diverse variety of penis sizes in the animal kingdom, but there is also a wide range of shapes that animal penises come in. For example, the extremely well-endowed Argentine Lake Duck has a bizarre corkscrew-shaped penis. Not only that, but the average penis size for this breed of duck is a mammoth 8 inches! It's hard to imagine how they stay afloat. Interestingly, pigs are also blessed with curly penises. And you thought it was just their tails.

Another interesting member of the animal kingdom is that of squids and octopuses. They actually have one of their tentacles, called the hectocotylus, that transforms into a massive penis. One breed of octopus, the argonaut, actually has a detachable penis that swims to its mate and impregnates her remotely. You should tell your girlfriend about the argonaut next time she accuses you of having intimacy issues!

How To Make Your Penis Appear Bigger

You’re not the only one wondering how to make your penis appear bigger, which means you aren’t the only one asking the wrong question. Consider this: even if you followed a couple of pointers (tighter pants, briefs instead of boxers, miscellaneous enlargement methods), if the rest of you isn’t attractive, then your penis size is irrelevant.

Have you ever gone out on a date with a girl who wasn’t very interesting, but looked like she had nice breasts, until you went home with her and realized you were attracted to a padded bra? Voila. Right now you are trying to find the male version of an under-wire, instead of looking into how to make yourself more sexually attractive to females.

Before continuing, it’s important to make something clear: men care about penis size far more than women do. Men watch pornography and compare themselves to gargantuan penises. Men check each other out in the locker room to see if they match up to the average penis size. Men write articles for Maxim and AskMen.com about how to make a penis appear bigger. It’s far lower on the female priority list, below over-all attractiveness and knowing what to do between the sheets.

Keep in mind there are some down sides to having a bigger penis, not including the threat of your member resembling a professional bodybuilder.

The average vaginal length is 4 inches. That means even if you have an average penis size, you’re probably longer than your partner will be. If you have a larger penis, that:

• Really limits the options if you want to have full-penetration sex.
• Means you risk causing your sexual partners significant pain.
• Can lead to receiving unfulfilling oral sex.
• Creates awkward scenarios when unwanted erections crop up.
  

It’s really a grass-is-greener situation when it comes to penis size. Where the grass is always greener, however, is when you’re in a place where you can seduce a woman and have her coming back for more. Try the following tips for best results.

Be Confident in Your Penis Size

It shows. The more confident you are, the less anyone (including yourself) will think you need a bigger penis.

Read A Book

No, not Twilight, and not a chick-lit account of retail-therapy, either. This is about you becoming a more self-assured and sexy man. If you really don’t like novels, at least read the newspaper (the sports page doesn’t count). What you have to say matters far more to women than where you rank on the average penis size scale.

Find the Clitoris and the G-Spot Simultaneously

Enough said. With a little research and practice, it won’t matter if you’re a eunuch.