Dear Morgan: Premature Ejaculation

Dear Morgan,

My boyfriend ejaculates really quickly every time we have sex. Are there any tricks we can use to make sex last a little longer?

Slow It Up



Dear SIU,

I can do a little back-tracking and assume that you’re browsing this site trying to find answers to this very question. You’re on the right trail, SIU – keep reading.

Premature ejaculation can happen for a number of reasons, ranging from the psychological to the physiological. Because I’m not working directly with you guys as a therapist, and because you wrote me a two line question, it’s difficult to guess the underlying issue.

Fortunately, many of the solutions run along common lines so we might be able to find something that works for your partner. Firstly, you say that he ejaculates quickly every time you have sex. In serious cases many doctors will prescribe an anti-depressant like Prozac. Please note that serious cases are rated as such when men are not able to control their orgasms and feel significant distress. If you’re hoping for penis pills that address premature ejaculation only, you might be a few years off. There are talks of development, but I’ve yet to have a journal cross my desk that had a promising article.

I’m guessing your boyfriend doesn’t fall into that category because you’re asking an advice columnist, and not a doctor. In keeping with that, I think he should start penis exercises in order to try and regain some control over his orgasms. Stretching and jelqing can help, so click through to find articles on our site about those specific practices. These articles focus on penis enlargement, but the effect you’re looking for is generally included in the benefits of these exercises.

While you guys are going at it, try stopping, taking a breather, and then starting again. It might take a lot of practice [but who is complaining about having more sex?], but eventually you can reach a rhythm where you begin to recognize when he is getting close, he pulls out, thinks about baseball and Queen Elizabeth, and then goes back at it.


Are you having regular sex? If you’re only doing it once or twice a week, that might not be enough for him to become accustomed to the sensations. Step up the frequency, folks!

Try bringing him to orgasm before you start penetrative sex. Blowjob, handjob, footjob – whatever works for you two. Let him cum, then let him get you off – he can go down on you while he gets his ‘man-ergy’ back, and with any luck he should have a reasonable erection by the time you reach orgasm. Then have penetrative sex. Ideally he won’t have such a hair trigger response because he has had an orgasm relatively recently.

This is a panel of suggestions – start with whichever seems easiest, and then move along from there. Regardless of which technique you guys try out, you will definitely need to have an open conversation about this that is ongoing. Keep checking in and see what works, and remember to be supportive of him – this is a sensitive issue!

Post-Op Penis Enlargement Exercises

Penis enlargement exercises can make a radical difference in the life of a man, whether cisgendered or trans. Little publicized by a popular media that is often more fascinated by vaginoplasty, considered to be the more successful, more functional surgeries that endow trans-women with female genitalia, phalloplasty can be a life-changing surgery for FTM transfolk.

There have been a few questions posted on the message-board asking about how well penis stretching works, and if it is advisable after surgery. We've taken a look, and would like to share what we've found.

Before we dive in, let's take a peek at some of the terms we are going to be using in this article. While we're discussing the direct effects of penis exercises on the results of bottom-surgery, a subject of interest to a specialized audience, we'd still like to make sure that no one is left behind.

Post-Surgery Penis Enlargement Exercises: These specific penis stretching techniques prevent the new organ from shrinking or warping by maintaining the elasticity of the skin.

FTM: This stands for Female-To-Male, meaning a transgendered individual who was born a woman but identifies as a man.

Transgendered: This blanket term applies to all people who are diagnosed one gender at birth, and have grown up or come into the feeling that they are in fact a different gender.

Cisgendered: Unlike the transgendered person, a cisgendered individual has a gender identity that agrees with their assigned sex.

Phalloplasty: This surgery applies both to cis and transgendered individuals, as it is performed both on men who have lost their genitals due to accident or disease, as well as transmen who are fulfilling their idea of self.

Are There Penis Exercises I Might Have To Perform Before Surgery?

For transmen considering Metoidioplasty, a procedure that will give you a functional, yet typically quite small, penis. Before undergoing the procedure the labia will implanted with tissue expanders that will lengthen and draw out the tissue. This is in preparation for a later operation in which the surgical team will join the labia together to create a scrotal sac and place silicon testicles inside.

For How Long After Surgery Must Penis Enlargement Exercises Be Performed?

This is by no means intended to be an authoritative medical text, so please be sure that you refer first to the medical information handed to you by your practitioner. Specific instructions will be found there. That said, our research has turned up a few different opinions.

Of course the type of surgery you are considering will of course influence the manual penis stretching exercises you are expected to perform afterwards. In some cases, such as after a phalloplasty in which a pump has been installed in order to allow mechanical erections, they are strictly prohibited.

Some people advise a course of manipulations not unlike jelqing, where the organ is slowly 'milked' upwards, forcing blood down the length of the shaft and encouraging a stretch.

In the case of metoidioplasty patients, penis exercises may not have a great effect. The micro-penis that is created by this surgery depends more on the size of the clitoris, rather than the skill of the surgeon. Manipulation after the fact may encourage lengthening, but the results would be minimal.

Ultimately, for transmen considering surgery there are a range of other post-op procedures to keep track of that eclipse penis enlargement exercises in importance. Courses of antibiotics, rest, and proper health can go a long way towards making sure you wind up with a healthy set of male genitals.